They are trying to make you feel less because they are. A fixed person needs everyone less educated, less confident, and less aware so the facade, false self-construct and trauma bond are not seen. By doing this, they expose themselves in many ways to those who are educated outside the coercive control facade… all actions, deceptive statements and any form of abuse, abuse to cover up abuse via thrid party, it is all a key tell to who is the deceptive person trying to push shame and accountability on to others with a certain approach trying to be something else… even using D.A.R.V.O. shows a serious personality disorder trying to dop something via others. Nothing is hiding in plain sight. Learn the subtle tells first, the old statements and actions for seeing the full spectrum of capacity when fear of exposure is triggered so the hidden second narrative is kept hidden along with the strange abuse projection and need to own other people’s perception. Why do victims keep getting abused after walking? Simple. Learn to add boundaries and ‘I am on to you’ in ways so you can bring it out in the open so they expose themselves.

Before explaining how a deceptive person tells on themselves, the important subject of shame should be understood first; this will help someone trying to spot the difference when someone is smeared with an action called D.A.R.V.O. via abuse to cover up abuse or a professional victim card or both. The victim's shame and the abuser's shame are different, which is part of how a deceptive person tells on themselves. Do not be confused about how a real victim acts and a highly deceptive blam-shifting abuser acts who may assume, “It is different when I do it.” That can be linked to their role reversal from childhood, trying to be the parent over everyone with control issues as they overplay their hand.

A re-position of shame when fearing exposure, an action with timing and triggers. The history, the everything, the moment, the disconnection and not accepting a trauma bond, facade, the false self-construct presentation will have a very obvious reaction (when educated) that many will feel as genuine as the deceptive person who gaslights, will be well versed in the cover-up to a point. The whole process is deceptive, but it is key to know the internal and external behaviours are all linked so people can protect themselves from abuse and influence to cover up abuse. A deceptive person wants to own other people’s perception so the smear is the confession and an extension of deceptive abuse… They don’t see boundaries, so why would they stop if shame can't be re-positioned? The shame is a key indicator as the agenda is different; dumping it fast with a narrow imagination has a generic timing. “A reaction to something, not reaction to nothing.” Their own lies used to shame truth and fact is an extension of trying to be more than others to keep the control issues stimulated; internal goes external.

Speaking to the right person, research (a lot of research), and counselling can help a victim remove shame from situations linked to not seeing something happen sooner, or not noting at the right time. In some situations, people are linked to a deceptive person who uses labels and position and take advantage of that position, so navigation happens to the victim until the abuse is exposed fully. The victim will make extra considerations that shouldn’t need to happen… that creates another situation to asses correctly. An effect or tolerance, the effect of empathy being drained, going along with what is toxic for one is toxic for two. Staying for justified reasons that are brainwashed in a trauma bond.

Deceptive person biases do not care about cause and effect, or they would change rather than find control and stimulation. If control issues are stimulated and the detachment doesn’t process accountability, “nothing is wrong”. Don’t be fooled; a deceptive person knows what they are doing; it is justified (another tell) and fantasy issues with serious flaws… the damaged feedback loop that only thinks of the self. Study emotional age and biological age not matching up with a deceptive person's mind games and how they mirror their bad role model… the survival tools given through abuse, suppression and no accountability, or all three. A bad role model isn’t going to offer accountability if they don’t understand it themselves... what is not felt is not understood, and if feedback brings shame, you have more tells.

Abuse projection, the role reversal from now being the adult age (not emotional an adult), the projection on the environment copies what was learned, human nature for some without growth… the conditioning takes hold. this is very unfortunate for everyone in the facade, trauma bond who questions the false self-construct hiding the second narrative. If someone is unstable with feedback, what is happening behind the mask trying to create containment? The internal is now on the external if containment is used to cover up deception, fraud and abuse.

The same internal filtered processing that creates the ‘fit the narrative’ is now making a facade to hide inside. The facade is a protection system from accountability, truth, fact, and the real adult world, where people can deeply connect and have relationships with unspoken truths, boundaries, and behaviour parameters. Another tell it is abusing boundaries before ‘fear of exposure’ and after… especially after as an unstable, biased, deceptive person wants control over the facade, false self-construct and other people's perception, so the smear campaign is the confession of deception with re-positioned shame to their victim.

Back to victim shame for a moment, it can come from understanding someone expected them to be enabled for supply, stimulation or coverup. Not seeing it sooner. That will go with the right pathway and insight; knowing their deceptive person better beyond the projection they were giving out to hide in plain sight means the mind removes the questions they shouldn’t need to answer, such as ‘was it someone I couldn’t keep doing, keep them balanced and topped up, even though it drained me.’

That suggestion is a simple example is key to knowing who is the actual deceptive person is creating drama to hide behind an important tell. Look at the energy levels of other people around the deceptive person who can search for narcissistic supply in a number of ways, empathy attention such at narcissistic supply, but also supply from chipping and polling others, trying to falsy raise themselves without any certification, no purpose, but done by lowering others with smear, gossip and blameshift. The not-so-hidden lack of an internally unbalanced system keeps pushing away accountability awareness with detachment. The same detchament happening on the internal… on the external Obvious? See it, know it, and observe the cycle as you can observe the abuse cycle, which is in four chapters.

The first step to removing victim shame is finding growth beyond carrying someone else’s problems, assuming via conditioning, carrying someone else’s hidden trauma bond so they don’t need to. If you are doing the heavy lifting while growing with time, that is a X2 responsibility… plus the deceptive person doesn’t want growth. They can’t grow, so you are stunted by their coercive control issues to keep everyone the same in the facade without triggers… an abusive stuck person in time will say and do things others just won’t go near.

Life and time outside a trauma bond, facade and away from a masked false self-construct takes in reality differently. Reality moves faster than a controlling facade that has its own made-up rules, keeping its own council with a fixed mindset that cannot take feedback… no, feedback is linked to development stages and experiences and choices to not do the work and assumed that is for other people… the flaw is they try to control perceptions and ruin their own growth internally.

Everything will be more rigid, so accountability is pushed away... Starting to spot the mind and actions linking up? Are you sure they don’t want human growth like everyone else? Are others really food to feed off? What is the agenda that drains people who do not identify boundaries and considerations, or create a negative towards development and insight? Do they know everything already? Do they already assume a false position through constant ‘wants’ to be a few inches higher in an ego state? (hiding something, double naasartive, one for them another for others, mindgames).

Why do deceptive abusers try to destabilise others and can't take it if you remove their abusive, deceptive, false image mirror and put a reality mirror in its place with accountability? Red flag: The deceptive person is now fearing exposure by doubling down the containment, and the external ‘fit of the narrative’ appears from behind the mask in a certain way.

Everything plays out differently if you pay attention to the who, what, where, why and how at all times. (see book section) Deceptive shame is hiding the lack of growth, the re-positioning of abuse on others is a lack of accountability as they chose not to do the work to be a fully balanced adult; they are trying to go against human design. Others like growth as they see and feel the reward as they get older… human design with consideration. That is how the deceptive shame builds up and becomes a projection. They have the hand brake on for accountability, trying to apply coercive control internally and also externally on others through fear of being left behind, constantly feeling unhealthy comparisons through want to be slightly above to protect the fragile ego that hasn’t had air in a long time.

It is not a mystery how to spot something; it can be a strong gut instinct to trust, training, research, or emotional intelligence that knows from experience. So, where do you start? There are many professionals on the web offering insight, the tricks to catch the trickster in the facade who doesn’t realise the world can see them for who they are… just not the ones caught in the facade suitable to the influence… for now.

For example, after brain fog is removed, simply join the dots going back decades, go beyond face value, and note everything. Everything… timing. The delusion of assuming a justified action and statement or any form of deflecting abuse is acceptable and normalised. Why would someone try to normalise abuse? Fragile ego control issues for a start, a life of lies that would harm the false self-construct, their crafted creation. The problem with an abusers facade is it was created by their bad role model, they learned it from someone, it is far from original, but that’s why fanstay plays its part so the person feels more special than others… its theirs and no one ca see it. The abuser’s self-deception plays its part due to the lack of self-awareness, another tell. The lack of self-awareness and patterned behaviour is the detachment from processing accountability; a bottleneck bypass happens to everything else… so they lose through their own abuse. The fear of getting left behind is because they are getting left behind but won’t face the controlling projection on the others.

They make themselves get left behind and suppress their inner voices to do the work to catch up. Coercive control appears in a number of ways, although without education, they hide it very well and always at the expense of others… The dangerous tell is children under a deceptive person are held back to serve the parent in certain ways. The partner is emotionally aged 7 to 9, for example, while still operating in a number of ways. They need to be more than others subtly, be special, or have a certain emotional direction pointed at them instead of allowing the children to grow in reality, not a facade.

Exposure Note Taking: Do not forget the all-important coverup… the smear campaign, the re-positioning of debris (the actions that mess up the hidden second narrative) pushed away fast in a drama, which is, in fact, the confession. Find closure that the fixed mind is a gateway to something hidden and hidden for a good reason… it would ruin everything. Who wants to have someone put that on to others when others want to do something else, as humans are meant to do something else? The smear confession can contain the exact actions a deceptive person is taking, indivisible damage, they are just smart at doing something toxic, never practising to do the right thing, that is for other people and out of reach unfortunate. It is very unfortunate that deceptive people exist, they learn the wrong tools from someone or something and never stop to make different choice. This is why people should learn to protect their empathy to not be drained and not go along with something unhealthy for two. Most of what people endure is a crime, but they were persuaded not to see it that way; the coercive control tells someone is conditioned to applicant abuse, and the coverup gets the abuser into double trouble.

A narrow imagination that uses their own filtered and re-shaped lies and actions is linked to projected shame. The shame is not created by the emotional abuse, actions, or statements onto others, they need that release and control over others while hiding the stimulation. The internal system can’t deal with life, accountability, and a finger pointed at then with ‘you are an abuser’. The covert type will fall apart so they harm the truth with tactics. The deceptive person feels shame from being found out and is unable to justify in a way that won’t hide its core origins. Why do they abuse for stimulation and cover-up? Why the ego, the lack of emotional intelligence, and the need for a facade should be there in the first place? The exposure is too much, it is a world breaking action to be found out for years of something they fear will ruin the false self construct. The tell, the overreaction to one thing is, in fact, a reaction to many deceptive actions not seen just yet, but they know they are hidden under the false self-construct that forgets, bypasses, dismisses, chips can handle being an adult luie everyone else.

To recap, the tells that emotional abusers try to hide at the blueprint level: (Never take anything at face value; that is their goal beyond everything as they are at what level?)

The narcissist mask is different to other kinds of masking. Do not mix it up with anything else. It has a different agenda; something behind it can’t survive without it. Whip it off, and both people can suffer. One will find growth; the other won’t. One will change, and the other will stay stuck, causing further exposure to love bombing, hovering, smear, gossip, avoidance, deflection, third-party abuse to cover up abuse, and coercive control at any expense. Stuck in the facade they created. They hold themselves back without realising it, at the same time always wanting to hold others back for numbers deep insecurity reasons that can be quite surprising. So they scam and control others for stimulation with mind games… the school yard maybe?

Trying to wear an abusive narcissistic mask, creates a set of compensating behaviours. Humans with empathy do one thing, deceptive people do something else in the primary evidence and, the secondary evidence chapter.

Irreversible damage caused by fear of exposure is a sign of something seriously wrong, and trying to cover it up is a sign of something seriously wrong. Trying to hide a hidden second narrative is a sign that something is seriously wrong. Using third parties to abuse to cover up abuse is a sign of something seriously wrong. Not having empathy for others will be for a number of reasons; if something has happened during the development years and the matter isn’t addressed in adulthood, the tough reality is everyone who can grow and educate will when needed. The deceptive abuser won’t. Don't make a healthy comparison to someone who makes toxic compassion toward others for attention and cover-up; it's only going to drain and offer stimulation. The deceptive emotional abuser will be a thousand-foot step from the population you will assume; it's a different reality, a false reality made well before anything saw it coming.

A simple rule when dealing with odd statements is actions to serve one at the expense of others. They don’t get it; they are thinking about something else. Those with empathy for others require education on the full spectrum of human behaviour to not have their good intentions taken for a ride, a rollercoaster ride or a contained space. The reminder: gaslighted constantly with the silent treatment in rotation (unstable, wants something not balanced), abuse cycles, rage, deception statements, fraud, deflection, projection, blameshifting shame, noting people drained around a deceptive charming person with a second narrative or facade, consider this:

What some say and do at a certain time. What someone doesn’t say and do at a certain time. And the third element is what should be happening. For Those with empathy for others, many actions and statements are off-limits. Certain deceptive opportunist that takes information and uses it for gain might just be getting two groups to argue while they step back, or they could be deflecting away while they do the exact thing they claim is happening to them while using many from various angles to cover up on their behalf. The hurt they want to project comes from a place not seen at first, as they need a mask. Find real people, it will be like breathing fresh air instead of smelling deception that is being conditioned to smell of roses. Everything is on display when you have the right people in your life; the change will lift everything suppressed in a design to serve a damaged feedback loop hidden in plain sight… or is it?

There are a number of ways to expose a deceptive person beyond them exposing themselves to those educated. If you know why they are deceptive and abusive and cover it up, look at their inside, the bit they can’t do themselves. Swap the false self-construct mirror for a reality check, but reality needs good people to get on with their lives, knowing there are eight billion and not everyone wants to hide in an abusive facade with control issues trying to hide. Who wants to hide? How will life be radiated? How will the soul find its true purpose? How will achievement and goals be achieved without the all-important truth that allows people to find greatness? When people realize deception, people expose themselves and don’t become a carbon copy, carry on the abuse cycle, find growth and do something else… something else happens… something always happens, as there is a little thing called cause and effect. Pattern behaviour is a person never learning. That puts everyone else at a seriously huge advantage over a deceptive person… that’s what they don’t want you to know… they are very flawed. The obvious link is how could various forms of deception and abuse be anything other and flawed, and where does that come from? The internal agenda trying to offer a second narrative directly or indirectly, to keep the hidden something… hidden, really? It is really hidden?